Telling the Truth to Our Children... Especially During Christmas Season.
The most wonderful time of the year is quickly approaching. A time that is full of great music, great scenery, and great fellowship. It's also a time when we can revisit childhood memories as we watch shows from our youth. I, for one, always look forward to The Charlie Brown special where Linus preaches, and Home Alone 2 (especially the part when Kevin sees the little boy in the children's hospital window and they start playing "Christmas Star..." I digress). In fact, I've been looking forward to Christmas for so long that I began listening to the holiday station on Pandora in July. I'm sure I am not the only one; the season kind of does that to you; and if it does that to grown ups, imagine how our children feel.
Think back to your childhood, I imagine that most of us will no doubt have positive memories from Christmas. Everything about the season is geared towards their temporal happiness. Especially the jolly old friend who makes his annual appearance with gifts in tow.
Ah yes, Santa Claus, what a loveable figure he is. For many kids he is THE image of hope in the world. And parents, knowing this to be true, do not want to steal that hope from their children. And so, even though we know Santa is a fictional being, we tell our kids he is real, or give them vague answers about his existence so the hope can live on. In other words we lie to them.
Another person whom we give half truths about is Jesus. Pick up a children's bible, although the publishers are attempting to bring a type of "Jesus awareness" into our kids lives, it is not a completely truthful depiction; it is, rather, the parts about Jesus that we think they are ready to digest. Now I am not suggesting you have a discourse with your children about the cruelty of crucifixion just yet, but if we are going to tell about him, we cannot tell palatable stories that are easy on the ears of the listener. Because the power and the hope is actually found in the entire story, not the approved-as-safe version. (Indeed, the approved-as-safe versions ALWAYS leaves one misunderstanding the whole thing.)
Instead of telling half truths about Jesus and Santa we ought to simply tell the whole truth about both. There is nothing wrong with our children hearing a story about a fictional character who loves children so much that he endeavors to give them all gifts on Christmas day. No, that is a fantastic story; our children need to hear stories like that. It helps stir their imagination and it doesn't confuse things for them.
Likewise, we ought to speak the story of Jesus to our children in truthful ways that they can understand. Again, I'm not suggesting that you terrify your children with graphic biblical images. I am suggesting that parents should learn to tell the Jesus story in ways that even small children can hear and follow along; that is, give it to them the same way you give them other instructions. We are skillful at helping our kids understand difficult things; do the same with the gospel. Don't water it down and dilute it, instead break it down to a child's level of understanding (In fact, this is a good way of testing how well we know the story ourselves). Then when they grow older and ask, "Mommy, is Jesus real?" The parent can lovingly respond "Yes, he is real." And when they ask more questions we can be prepared to explain more.
See, in the same way the Santa story leads to questions and longing feelings within a child, an honest telling of a man who actually did come to give a gift to everyone will also bring questions. But in this case the questions might lead to an everlasting hope, instead of the eventually let down in learning that he isn't real.
Our children don't need to be sheltered nearly as much as we think; we do them a disservice when we sugarcoat and tell half truths to preserve and protect their childhood. Tell them both stories, but be truthful about both. They can take it.